How can I help  myself?

  We all have our own ways of dealing with depression. Here’s a list we’ve compiled from our

patients, from our families and friends, from books, pamphlets, the Internet, and  from just plain common sense.  Some of these answers won’t be right for you, some could be excellent .

  Look through these  until you find something useful.

  At Home:

       Keep a diary. Write it down. Get it out on paper. Defining it with pen and ink may help you stop dwelling on it and move on. If it’s really bad stuff, writing it out and then destroying it can sometimes help.

      Be a bit special for a while, look after yourself more. Don’t take yourself for granted.

     Music helps. Really listen to music, both old favourites and something new.

      Reading is good.  If you can’t concentrate on something serious escape into something lighthearted. Itdoesn’t matter whether it’s pulp fiction, Harry Potter, or PG Wodehouse. Don’t tackle anything too gloomy until you’re strong enough for it; Dostoevsky isn’t a good idea when you’re feeling low. Re-reading a favourite book can be like meeting an old friend. If your concentration is poor, knowing the plot already will make the read easier.

      If  things are really bad and you feel like harming yourself in some way, don't be on your own.  Make sure there are  other  people around. Make human contacts, by phone if not in person.  If you haven’t got anyone you can phone, try the Samaritans, even if things aren’t quite that bad yet.

    If you’re stuck in a rut, try to choose basic  activities you know you can do, not major challenges which would be difficult at the best of times.

      Look after your nutrition. Eat regularly and properly. Don’t stuff yourself with comfort food, but allow yourself an occasional treat – even if it is junk food. Cheat sometimes – just have a ready meal to save time and bother.

  Be careful about alcohol. In general, drinking heavily or regularly makes depression worse. Antidepressants can also alter how a drink will affect you. They can’t work effectively if you are drinking anything more than just modest amounts.

     Give yourself a treat; buy yourself something you like.

     Chocolate is rumoured to have a mild antidepressant effect. (I like to believe this one)

     Cook yourself a special recipe.  Next time, ask a friend to join you.

    Take a long bath by candlelight, get some of those soothing scented bathroom candles.

            Put a silly game on the computer, but don’t play it all night.

            Get  a really funny classic video out.  And allow yourself to have a good laugh watching it.

             In India they have these laughing clubs,  people get together and just laugh out loud in groups. Try it on your own.(in private might be wisest until it catches on in this country!) 

           Get some exercise. Go to the Gym, walk, run, or cycle. Do it every day, just for 20 minutes is a good start. Don’t take it too seriously, just try to get out of breath a little.

           Practice dancing, start off on your own. Doesn’t matter if you aren’t too elegant, who’s looking anyway?

    Mess about in the garden. Plant something if the weather permits; and then you can look after it and watch it grow, a curiously satisfying experience.

    Sing along to your favourite record. (Even if you’re tone deaf!) Sing in your car if you don’t want to make too much noise at home. Singing uses your chest and diaphragmatic muscles, gets your circulation going, blows away the cobwebs, and is surprisingly relaxing.

       If you’re feeling bogged down, and everyone you know seems to irritate you, try to spend time among people you don’t know, who won’t be intrusive. Sometimes it’s easier to confide in a neutral stranger.

      Take one bit of the day at a  time, don’t think too far ahead.

     Set yourself  a small task, such as an easy piece of housework, perhaps  clearing out an old cupboard, and actually do it. Enjoy the feeling of accomplishment. Then do a slightly larger task..  Paint the kitchen ceiling. Or clear out the garden shed.

     Springclean, (even if it’s the autumn.). Get rid of a box full of stuff that you know you’ll never use or wear again. Give it to a Charity shop, or put it out for recycling. Then stand back and admire the space you’ve cleared.

   Find out how to  meditate. Evening classes are often run by local authorities.  If you are feeling too low to meditate, read something out loud.

If you are on medication:

      Take it consistently (the same time each day) and persistently (for as long as directed.)

      Find out from your GP what side-effects may occur, and what to do if they do.

      Don't stop taking medication or change dosage without taking your doctor’s advice.           

      Ask about mixing medication. If you need to take anything else, (even cold remedies – these can interact with some antidepressants) ask your Chemist or GP. Ask about alcohol if you need to.

Get a pet. 

           Just for the time being, put your emotional problems on hold. Get back into them later on when you recover.

          Keep in touch with your doctor. Work with him or her. Don’t miss appointments, even if you feel too tired or ill to go. If you feel you aren’t making progress or getting anywhere, say so.  Ask for further help, maybe a medication review or a further opinion.

         Concentrate on enjoying the comic strip in your newspaper, leave the serious stuff for later. There’s enough sadness in the world.

          Buy yourself some flowers.

   At work;

         Always try to avoid sitting at your desk for meal breaks and coffee. Go and mix with other people, or just get some fresh air and private space somewhere.

       Let people know that you’re not 100% at the moment. Confide in someone, get someone on your side. Can any part of your work be eased, put on the back burner, or postponed?

        When  you are feeling depressed, you may find you can’t manage your usual amount of mental work, but you probably can do more physical activities instead (even if you don’t really want to much).  Try to  put off the more challenging, intellectual stuff until you’re feeling better.

     Don’t  tackle difficult tasks when you are down in the dumps. Avoid major work or personal decisions. Delegate, shelve, or pass on as much responsibility as you can, try to concentrate on routine – which can be surprisingly soothing.

    Use time management tactics. Pace yourself, divide your work into smaller chunks, and work at a steady pace . Don’t rush, take it piece by piece.  Prioritise your tasks, and be prepared to abandon some of your lower priorities – or shelve some of your more overwhelming tasks.

If you find that you are a procrastinator, start by getting one thing done at a time.

     Make a list of things you need to do. Divide them up into

                                                      “Do it now ” i.e. today’s jobs (keep this list short)

“Do it later” and put these in your diary.

“Get someone else to do it” (if you can)

“ Bin it!” (and be ruthless)

Beware “displacement activity” eg making yourself frightfully busy with something unimportant.

         Cross the things you’ve achieved off the list, but check through them occasionally. Give yourself a pat on the back. about the ones you’ve done. This works at home or at work.

         If you have an Occupational Health department, let them know if you are not well. They are an independent source of advice and may be able to help make adjustments to your workplace to reduce the pressure until things improve.

        Be realistic. Don’t demand too much from yourself. Don’t set yourself impossible tasks that you aren’t going to manage, as they will only increase feelings of failure. 

      Make time for yourself in your working day.

     Don’t be a  perfectionist. Settle for “good enough” just for the time being.

  With other people;